Book Review: Jay Asher – “Thirteen Reasons Why”

Clay Jensen returns home from school to find a strange package with his name on it lying on his porch. Inside he discovers several cassette tapes recorded by Hannah Baker – his classmate and crush – who committed suicide two weeks earlier. Hannah’s voice tells him that there are thirteen reasons why she decided to end her life. Clay is one of them. If he listens, he’ll find out why. Clay spends the night crisscrossing his town with Hannah as his guide. He becomes a firsthand witness to Hannah’s pain, and learns the truth about himself-a truth he never wanted to face. (Source: amazon.com)

Can you personally feel sad and sorry in a physical way for a fictional character? After this book, I’d say yes. A hundred times yes.

If I was to do my review in a conversation with someone, using words, then I’d first have to find the ability to speak again. Because this book left me absolutely speechless. It’s about ignorance, about ignorant people who rather turn their backs on other people and their problems instead of trying to help them to prevent them from doing something stupid. And after having read it, I have to admit that I totally get why Hannah killed herself and I could easily picture myself in her place in the past and even today.

I loved the way Jay Asher wrote this book – it changes from Hannah’s narration through her tapes with the first person narration done by Clay. It gives the story speed, but not too much to be confusing. And in some parts, him speaking and Hannah speaking mixes after only a word or a few words, and the reader can basically hear the desperation in Clay’s words, see his from sadness distorted face in front of them. Asher makes the reader feel sorry for Clay, and me, personally, I felt like hugging him through the entire book, even if he’s nothing but a fictional character – but you really just have to love Clay. He’s one of the most likeable characters I’ve ever read about, and learning about Hannah’s story partly from his point of view makes him even more likeable, because it’s like the reader himself is experiencing what Clay is going through. It’s a total different kind of narration than what most authors do, but for this kind of story, there couldn’t have been a better one. It gives it an even deeper meaning and leaves the reader with a bad aftertaste after each chapter, because I bet there are a lot of readers who can empathize with either Clay or Hannah, or maybe even both.

Bullying itself is the most horrible thing in the world. I know what I’m talking about, because it happened to myself during schooltime. But what happens with Hannah’s story is – in my opinion – way worse. Due to rumors being spread about her because she does not behave the way her schoolmates – mostly boys, but there are also girls doing her wrong – a snowball effect kicks in. One rumor leads to someone’s action, that leads to another action, to another, and so on. And all the while, Hannah is misunderstood, seen as someone she just isn’t. She is never given the chance to explain things, to show people who she really is. And at one point, after more and more bad things happen to her – betrayal, utilisation, sexual harassment, abuse – she just gives up.

The most horrible thing is that there were changes about her that were there, for everybody to see and notice, and still, nobody did ANYTHING about it. Which pretty much sums up the kind of society we all live in. Why bother with other people’s problems when we have enough of our own? Why realize that maybe there’s more to someone who used to be extroverted and suddenly stops connecting with anybody around him/her? And even when Hannah turns to a classmate who’s done her wrong, saying out loud for the first time that she needs someone to appreciate her, to notice her, he ignores it.

The end was absolutely devastating, and I rushed through it despite the fact that I already knew the end, all with tears in my eyes. For the one and only, the last time, Hannah decides she wants to live after all. That she does want to give someone the last chance to help her, to rescue her from giving herself up. She turns to someone who knowingly deals with problems, who knows about inner struggles and who’s job it is to help.

And she’s let down again.

At the end, Hannah says “I am sorry.” But in my opinion, someone who has committed suicide should not apologize to anybody they’ve left behind. Maybe that’s harsh towards those people. But to be honest, if those people were really connected to the person who killed himself/herself, if they cared enough, in my opinion, they should notice at least some changes, or signs that something isn’t right. And if they know that that person might not be the most stable in the world, the alarm bells should at least slowly start ringing in their heads. And if they didn’t…well, for me, these people then don’t even deserve any explanation or an apology. And for all the people out there who’ll shout “Damn hypocrite!” at me now: I’m not taking myself out of this. I do not see myself as a good friend, and personally, I have a problem with not only dealing with my own problems, no matter how they pile up, but also with other people’s. I have never learned real empathy when someone tells me their grandma died, or someone in their family is sick, or even not big things, like them losing their job or being dumped/dumping somebody. But nevertheless – at least that’s how I feel it is – I try to be there for them. I assure them that I’ll leave them alone if that’s what they need/want, but that whenever they need something/someone to vent, I’ll be there to listen to them ranting. I may be the worst giver of advises, but I see myself at least as someone who, even if she struggles with what’s thrown at her through other people’s problems, does NOT turn her back on these people. Of course, in reality, only my friends can really estimate if what I just said is total crap or not. But fact is, despite my flaws and helplessness with other people’s struggles, I am not a bad person. Different to all the young teenagers in this book who make me massively angry and horribly sad at the same time.

I don’t even know, nor do I want to know, the dark figure of how many young people kill themselves every year due to similar things that were described by Jay Asher. Or due to ignorant friends in someone’s life. Because it’s a heartbreaking thing to think about, that there is enough ignorance, backstabbing & loneliness in this society that people still have reasons to end their own lives.

And the most scaring thing?

That it can happen to everyone of us.

Because that’s our society.

And that’s the saddest thing to think about.

Thank you, Jay Asher, for your phenomenal, heartwrenching and emotional book, for a real insight into the depths of the world we live in. And here’s to the hope that one day, your book will make a difference for all the people who struggle with their lives, and make them see that one way or another, there CAN be a light at the end of the tunnel, even if it’s just someone calling their name in an empty hallway.